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4.15.2013
everyone seems to be in love with me all of a sudden.my boyfriend said he thinks he's falling in love with me. we've dated all of a month. (we've known each other for a while though.) kneejerk reaction: already? I don't think he's lying, but I don't believe him. I know that makes no sense. maybe I just don't want him to be in love with me. I like him. I do. I just don't know how serious I want to be right now. he loves me. Tell me again what the body's for, 'cause I can't feel it anymore. I lost mine and I need yours. We shouldn't sin. I want to hurt like it did before. It's only skin. one of my best friends told me he's had intermittent feelings for me for a long time. I think I may have been a little bit in love with him two years ago. there is nothing we can do about this now. there is nothing we want to do about this now. what we actually did do doesn't feel real and doesn't seem like it happened. we talked about it once, briefly, just to make sure neither of us were dreaming. we weren't. I get the feeling that if circumstances right now were different, maybe we'd try something. he loves me. If you go your own way, I can go my own way and we'll never speak of it again. Now that you feel, you say it's not real. my best friend won't say she's in love with me, but she is. sometimes I suspect that we'll wind up together in like 20 years. it wouldn't be the worst thing in the world. she is my best friend, after all. nobody understands me like she does. and I, her. it makes sense. she loves me. Can you go home, look your best friend in the eye? No, you can't go home after where you slept last night. In a dark room, we can do just what we like. You're my sister, and this love is fucking right. another good friend of mine confessed to being in love with me a few nights ago. I also love him, but I'm not sure in what way. he would do anything for me. and I'm more relaxed with him than I am with just about anyone else. he's not pushy or demanding or pretentious. he loves me. Come Saturday, you'll come to say maybe there's no harm in a wasted summer. We're gonna stay in. my ex-girlfriend called me from across the globe a few weeks ago and told me she loves me and she wishes things could have worked out between us but she's getting married and she's coming back to the states and she would like to see me, if I want to. I do want to. she's the only person I couldn't date because we were too good as friends. I miss her. she loves me. You know that I don't mind. You know that you're my kind. a guy I've worked with for a few months hasn't made any declarations of affection, but has started dropping little hints and compliments. I strongly suspect that this happened because of my boyfriend. ever since people found out, everyone has seemed to feel that NOW is a good time to tell me how they feel. now. now that I'm in a relationship. it's like everyone thinks they could have a chance, I guess. maybe they could. I don't know. I don't know what I'm doing. my boyfriend and I are a very strange couple. I wish I knew what I was doing with my boyfriend. or what he's doing with me. we talk about this a lot. for one thing, he's a good deal older than me. for another thing, we have nothing at all in common except for we both like each other, for whatever reason. it just bothers me that I can't figure out why I like him. when I'm with him, it works. when we're apart, I think and think and think and drive myself nuts. Held my breath, thought of death and things I'd like to do till then. See my friends, lose my head. Wake up with you in my bed. remind me how you'll never leave and every step could be your last... 1 Comments:
So many different levels of love..and I am sure you worry if you've really got the love they want.
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